Domestic Violence is an issue that affects millions of people each year. According to Futures Without Violence nearly one in four women in the United States reports experiencing violence by a current or former spouse or boyfriend at some point in her life. And those are just the cases that are reported.
To help raise awareness, to promote a sense of kinship for those who have experienced domestic violence, and to let victims know they are not alone and have options available to them, October has been designated as Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM). Here is a look into why DVAM is important and why we should all support it.
History
In an effort to connect advocates working to end domestic violence, the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) created a “Day of Unity” in 1981.
The first Domestic Violence Awareness Month was later observed in 1987 when the national domestic violence toll-free hotline, 1-800-SAFE (7233), and their website was introduced to provide victims with a way to seek help.
In 1989, Congress officially recognized October as Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM).
Importance
The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services explains that DVAM is important because, “During Domestic Violence Awareness Month, victim advocates, allied professionals, survivors of abuse, their loved ones, and the surrounding community come together to mourn the lives lost to domestic violence, to celebrate the progress that has been made to end this epidemic, and to connect with others to create change.”
They go on to say that even though events to raise awareness of domestic violence and its impact on individuals, families, and communities take place throughout the year, activities that are held during October to bring domestic violence to the forefront sends a message of solidarity and communicates important information to anyone impacted or currently experiencing violence against them, letting them know they are not alone and that there are resources and support available.
“We don’t only want people to know the signs of an abusive relationship, either for themselves or somebody else, but also for all of us to be able to recognize a healthy relationship versus an unhealthy one or an abusive one,” says Meredith McKeen, MSW, Vice President of Programs for NVFS. “We all have a role in ending the epidemic of domestic violence in our communities.”
What Is Domestic Violence?
Since domestic violence is a global issue, even the United Nations has guidelines on what the definition of the term means. According to their definition, “Domestic abuse, also called ‘domestic violence’ or ‘intimate partner violence,’ can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner.
Abuse is physical, sexual, emotional, economic, or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person. This includes any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone. Domestic abuse can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender.
It can occur within a range of relationships including couples who are married, living together, or dating. Domestic violence affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels.”
What Can Be Done?
Northern Virginia Family Service (NVFS) offers a number of programs that can help not only the victims of domestic violence, but also people who are concerned that a friend or family member is potentially being abused, the children of families where domestic violence is present, and even for the abusers themselves.
In addition, NVFS programs aim to prevent domestic violence before it happens through one-on-one counseling, group discussions, and workshops in the community to help people understand what goes into a healthy relationship. Some of the discussions are aimed at school-aged children to get them thinking about what a good friend is and what goes into being a good friend. For older kids and adults, they look at dating relationships. And for adults, what to look for in a potential life partner.
“Talking about healthy relationships can also be about teaching critical thinking, how do you think for yourself or make healthy and safe choices.But it can also be about identifying your goals and values, the things that are important to you,” says McKeen. “That’s important because if you are trying to evaluate if someone might be a good friend, a good dating partner, or a good life partner, they need to understand your values so they can support your choices and not try to undermine them.”
McKeen added that some of their programs also concentrate on age-appropriate “refusal skills,” or how to say no to something or get drawn into something you don’t want to engage in.
NVFS Is There For You
In addition to the different service areas that NVFS offers that might not specifically broach the subject of domestic violence, including the Hunger Resource Center, Healthy Families, Early Childhood Development, and Homelessness & Housing to name a few, NVFS understands that in every one of those programs they are likely serving people who have either been victims in the past or are experiencing domestic violence now.
“They’re not seeking domestic violence services the way they might be looking for assistance in some of our other programs, but we know people in our programs are experiencing domestic violence,” says McKeen. “So, it’s our job to equip all of our staff to be able to recognize and respond appropriately.”
Get Involved
Even if you’re not touched by domestic violence in your own relationships or those of friends and families, you can still help by volunteering at organizations like NVFS or joining a national organization. Spread the word through social media channels, attend seminars and rallies, work domestic violence hotlines, and be ready to share information and talk about it.
“The color of Domestic Violence Awareness Month is purple,” says McKeen. “On what is known as ‘Purple Out’ day, everyone wears purple to show their support. It’s a sign of solidarity. Believe it or not, when people who are experiencing domestic violence see others wearing purple, they know they are not alone. So, that one act may seem small or insignificant, but I can tell you that it’s not. I never want anyone to underestimate how impactful that can be for someone in a domestic violence situation.”
For those who need assistance, help is always available, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, through the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or https://www.thehotline.org/.
